Saint Trevor of the Perpetual El Dorado

Dibs said the other day that in chatting with pal Trevor recently, he learned an astonishing fact---Trevor only has 2 cars. Dibs says MLB should consider giving players bonuses such as new cars to play for the All Star Game, that Trevor's children will be needing cars. But what he really means is the hard working Yankee fan should buy Trevor another car--after all, MLB has grabbed over $100 million extra away from the Yankee fan this year without even saying please or thank-you--that's probably where the money would come from for the martyr, Saint Trevor. In the world of Trevor & his many agents, whether you or your kid has a car doesn't come into it. EVERYONE SHOULD BE DYING TO GIVE TREVOR STUFF...

• JUST GIVE HIM MORE MONEY OUT IN SAN DIEGO FOR HIS FAMILY. No one else has a family.
• THIS GUY IS VERY LUCKY HE HAS A JOB AT ALL. NO ONE WAS DYING TO HIRE HIM. Cleveland probably didn't want to just 'give' him the money.
• With a chance to beat an offer out of the sunshiny national league pitchers' park with no DH?(NO ORTIZ/MANNY).
• NO TEAM WAS GOING TO PAY HIM TO SIT THERE & PERFORM MINIMAL, PREDICTABLE SERVICE JUST SO HE COULD GET A MEANINGLESS STAT--which THE HOF HAS ALREADY SHOWN THEY DON'T BUY--ROLLIE FINGERS ALSO POINTED OUT IT'S NOT THE CONCLUSIVE STAT.
• BUT, THE HOME TOWN WAS TWISTED INTO THIS CRAZY BARGAIN WITH SAINT TREVOR OF THE PERPETUAL EL DORADO. HIS BROTHER NEEDS A JOB? FINE--HIRE HIM. TREVOR NEEDS MORE $? FINE--DON'T SIGN SOME OTHER GREAT PLAYERS, MAKING IT HARDER ON THE TEAM.
• GIVING THINGS TO THIS PERSON IS WHAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO. AND THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO GIVE HIM THE HOF, TOO. COME ON, JUST GIVE. WHY? NO REASON EXCEPT HE EXPECTS IT.

One question Saint Trevor is getting his barracudas out for--has him nervous. If the HOF voters asked, was he the best of his era? Not even close. Saint Trevor has run into the first person in his entire life that hasn't just rolled over for him. The acknowledged greatest closer in the history of baseball by AL MANAGERS, MANY PLAYERS and others, unlike Dibs, who've seen him play every day for 11 regular and 11 post seasons. (From listening to Dibs, I guarantee you a year ago he never dreamed this question would come up. He just didn't know about Mo.) No one who has a remotely similar job can even be mentioned in the same sentence. Of course, everyone except Saint Trevor knows that's Mariano Rivera.

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